Tag: bid for connection

Engaging in conversations takes effort and with today’s fast paced world where everyone is busy, we are required to exercise our judgment on the connections that we would like to nurture – and, conversations are a great way of doing so

Keywords: Lifestyle & Relationships

Do we need to have connections to have conversations OR do conversations build connections? Which comes first?

https://theartofconversations.com/2020/03/06/connections-or-conversations-which-first

A bid for connection is an action that tries to get your attention and indicates a desire for connection

The three ways that people respond to a bid for connection are:

  1. Turn Away
    – Shrug and ignore
    – Change the subject
    – Look at them for a moment, and then carry on with what you were doing
    – Respond apathetically
    – Quietly leave the room
  2. Turn Against
    – “What’s wrong with you?!”
    – “Why are you always so frustrated about everything!?”
    – “Can’t you tell I’m busy?! I do all the work around here. What do you ever do?!”
    – “That’s annoying, could you stop!?”
    – “If you’re going to act annoyed, could you do it somewhere else!?”
  3. Turn Towards
    – “What can I do to help you?”
    – “Why don’t I rub your feet while you tell me about your day.”
    – “I am so sorry that you have to deal with … that must be so awful. ”
    – “That’s hilarious! I wish I could have been there too!”
    – “Is something the matter?” or “Is something bothering you?”
    – “What’s on your mind? Would you like to talk about it?”

https://intimacypact.wordpress.com/2020/02/22/recognizing-responding-to-bids-for-connection